(written in Feb 2009)
Dear Shri Pramod Muthalik
Through the media, we have taken note of your offer to marry off people found holding hands with each other in public. In this context, we respectfully wish to offer our professional services to your esteemed organisation Sri Rama Sene.
Our organisation, Insta-Wed.com, specialises in just this sort of marriages. We believe that such instant weddings always, and without fail, lead to long-lasting happiness of the two (sometimes more) parties who have been married off. The long process of courtship, proposal, acceptance, etc of a love marriage, or the matching of horoscopes, negotiations over dowry, satisfying the weird demands of various parties in the more traditional form of marriage, are anachronistic in this day and age. After all, we live in an age when time is always at a premium. Hence, instant marriages are more fitting to this culture of speed and ‘do it now!’
True to the spirit of the values enshrined in the Constitution of our beloved country, Insta-Wed.com truly believes that caste, creed, religion, race, gender, age, number, species, genus, etc are no bars to a happy married life.
The following pictures of happy couples (sometimes couples of more than 2 people) will show you that our slogan “Just marry it!” is not just another piece of advertising – it is a philosophy that we follow, and we are delighted to add that all our customers agree that our ‘intervention’ has indeed filled their lives with joy.
Sometimes, Insta-Wed.com has successfully married off people who have never lived, or indeed could never have lived! We might add that inter-species marriage is our speciality.
Our most spectacular success has been these two happy people.
Although Insta-Wed.com has been in existence for just four days, the reputation it has built up for efficiency and instantaneity is excellent – our competition now consider us the gold standard in this burgeoning industry.
We look forward to receiving your esteemed order for more such happy unions.